"Some people, they can't just move on, you know, mourn and cry and be done with it. Or at least seem to be. But for me... I don't know. I didn't want to fix it, to forget. It wasn't something that was broken. It's just...something that happened."


"An ending was an ending. No matter how many pages of sentences and paragraphs of great stories led up to it, it would always have the last word."


"Looking back, it seemed like it should have been harder to lose someone, or have them lose you, especially when they were in the same state, only a few towns over." 

I want to write words worth quoting

"What is family? They were the people who claimed you. In good, in bad, in parts or in whole, they were the ones who showed up, who stayed in there, regardless. It wasn't just about blood relations or shared chromosomes, but something wider, bigger. We had many families over time. Our family of origin, the family we created, and the groups you moved through while all of this was happening: friends, lovers, sometimes even strangers. None of them perfect, and we couldn't expect them to be. You can't make any one person your world. The trick was to take what each could give you and build your world from it."

We're all just going along for the ride...

"Maybe it was true, and being a girl could be about interest rates and skinny jeans, riding bikes and wearing pink. Not about any one thing, but everything. "

". . .it didn't make you noble to step away from something that wasn't working, even if you thought you were the reason for the malfunction. Especially then. It just made you a quitter. Because if you were the problem, chances were you could also be the solution. The only way to find out was to take another shot."

If you wanna rock, you rock

Maybe...
Maybe I jump to things too quickly.
Maybe I make decisions one way or the other before I really have time to know.

Kind of like... Well, I'll use an actual example instead of going all metaphorical
A few weeks, months, whatever ago, I totally wrote off Clacel
but I started talking to her the other day, and she's just way different than I thought
maybe if I hadn't been in such a hurry to put her inside a box and attach my little check mark for categorized, I would have actually talked to her sooner and found out that she's really a cool person- and maybe not so different from me, at least in some ways.

Everything always has to have a category, and place for it to belong where I can know what it is and what it is not and so on and so forth. 

Maybe I rush into things in order to get them into a category. 

Maybe that messes things up

Maybe if I hadn't been so unnerved by Natasha being in limbo a while back, thing would be different. Don't get me wrong- I'm not saying I want things to be different, but who knows, maybe they would be. 

Sarah Dessen has females characters who always have problems like that, and they have some revelation of what they're doing, and with some work, they stop. 

The thing is, I don't need a revelation, I already know, I just... don't know how to stop.

Maybe I'm wrong, maybe it's not a bad thing at all, and this rationalization is just a defense mechanism, a way to make things that are nonsensical seem to make sense. 

Insanity- right?

In other news: Five more shows left. There's still time for you to come and see me be an asian princess.

Until the next update:

I really, really love Sarah Dessen's books- her character's are so... true to life. 

They've made a discussion board for her new book coming out- Along for the Ride. If you've read her stuff, check it out. If you haven't, time to get some new books. 

Plus... I get a chance to win an advanced copy of the book for posting this - :] Everyone loves the chance for free stuff, especially books.